tunnels

I am confused. That is not a new state of mind at my current stage in life, but an assertion of a fact. Confused about who I am, where I am, where im supposed to be, where im going and all of that. I have prayed, fasted, talked, sang, cried, but the confusion persists. I have heard that there is a light at the end of the tunnel, well, at this point, all I am sure of is that there is a tunnel and that its dark. i feel like ive been travelling down this tunnel for so long, i probably would not recognise the light if i saw it... Isnt that a bleak thought. So what do I want at the moment? Well a torch would be nice, illumination of this darkness would be gladly and very warmly received.

I was born alone and i shall die alone, how i live however should not be alone. This to me is easier said than done, its so easy to make beautiful statements and frame them on the wall. Every day you wake up, look at the beautiful statement, beat your chest in acknowledgement and go on doing the every opposite of what it says. Its so easy to read, but to do is another question all together. So I want to do and stop reading. Its like people who read all those great motivational books, i don't get it, so you can quote a half the book, you can make a great speech, but can you DO??

I guess reading the above, the way to get the light in the tunnel is to start doing, activate some of my thoughts, if they work well and good, if they don't then i can count them off the list of things to do

Get a little painted